Neil Mach

How to hand-out compliments on socials

Compliments are crazy-difficult to hand out. They can be a minefield of confusion if you’re not careful about what you are doing. What right do you have to judge the product or output of another person or give opinions about appearance and behavior?

Even if you have the best intentions, comments will translate as judgments or comparisons. So don’t use compliments willy-nilly. Be careful about using them at all. Choose, instead, to talk people up!

* Find something that’s gone unnoticed by others and comment favorably
* Using a name only takes a few keystrokes yet it is surprising how few bother with it
* Explain why you support a message and/or an intention behind the message to confirm you considered it carefully
* Give kudos for effort
* Interestingly, validations from a third party seem more important than those coming directly from you. Did some other person say something nice? Tell them who it was and what was said

Avoid compliments about a person’s physical presentation. Just because an individual looks good/sexy to you it doesn’t mean they want you to express it. And, anyway, it will come across as freaky if the person thinks you’ve been examining them a bit too closely!

Also, offering compliments to the opposite sex about physical appearance or clothing can make you seem creepy, seedy, or just plain dubious.

Remember: praise will lift your spirits — while it lifts theirs

Words: @neilmach 2020 ©

Fancy polishing up your communication skills? Neil shares tools, tips and advice for voicing and expressing on social media on his weekly Max Expressificity podcast